Blind Attraction Page 15

  “That’s what you say now,” Victoria sobbed. “I just wish it wouldn’t because then I could go on feeling miserable and maybe my heart wouldjust die and get it over with. Then I could live my life without suffering this awful pain.”

  “If it makes you feel any better, he looked just as shocked as you probably feel,” she offered, rubbing her hand up and down Victoria’s arm, trying to make her feel better but failing miserably.

  “It doesn’t,” Victoria murmured, offering a watery smile. Swiping at her tears with the back of her hand, she sniffed, “Do you think you could do me a favor?”

  “Sure, sweetie,” Taylor said, swiping a strand of honey blond hair from Victoria’s damp face.

  “Can you unlock the backdoor from the inside?” she asked, pushing herself to her feet. Using the wall to hold herself up, she said, “I’m a mess and I would prefer not to have to face anyone looking like this.”

  “It’s not so bad,” Taylor gallantly lied, her eyes darting to the left as she gnawed on her full, bottom lip.

  Victoria held up her hand, showing the black mascara marks; “I know how bad it is; I am not a pretty crier, especially when I’m wearing makeup.”

  “You’re right,” Taylor smiled tenderly, brushing the back of her thighs off. “You’re a mess; I’ll go open that door for you.”

  “Thanks, Tay,” Victoria said, as tears continued to leak out of her eyes. Was she ever going to stop crying? She should have remained skeptical; hadn’t Taylor told her that James always dated gorgeous model-perfect women? It was all there had she bothered to see past her own infatuation with the man.

  Maybe Victoria was taking this monumental blunder too seriously; she had long since stopped giving a damn what other people thought about her. Maybe he would still be attracted to her despite her lack of platinum blond hair and statuesque height. James hadn’t been too overly interested in discovering what she looked like, so she had just assumed that looks weren’t that important. But why would it matter since he apparently knew what she looked like all along? Maybe that zing wasn’t such a good indicator to begin with.

  No, she was going to calm down and figure this out after the store closed. If he stopped by later for their date, she would see what he had to say. And if he was still reeling from this shock and he didn’t show up, well, she would just have to go from there. They shared something, damn it; it couldn’t be over simply because she didn’t look like he thought she would.

  Feeling a little better, she knew she had to get through the rest of the day. Her door opened and she walked in, offering Taylor a tentative smile. “I’ll be down in a few.”

  “Not a problem, we’ve got it covered and if all else fails I can call in reinforcements,” Taylor assured her as she went back to the store front and Victoria headed up the stairs to her apartment.

  She walked into her living room and sighed; her bag from the weekend was still sitting out. Picking it up, she grimaced; it reminded her of James, of their weekend. It wasn’t over, damn it; he could decide that he liked petite, regular girls instead of statuesque blond goddesses. And if he couldn’t, well then, he was obviously the wrong man for her.

  But why did it have to hurt so much? She was a fool to believe in love at first sight, especially when the man in question couldn’t see. Stupid zing; if it weren’t for that, she doubted anything would have progressed further than a date or two. She should have employed more caution – the way she did in every other relationship she had ever attempted. Even if that zing was unique, had she slowed down, maybe it wouldn’t be such a catastrophe. She took a deep breath and reminded herself that it wasn’t as bad as all that.

  Staring at her image in her bathroom mirror, she had to laugh, though it came out more of a sob. Mascara streaked down her cheeks, her eyes were red and swollen, and her face was all blotchy. No one could accuse her of crying pretty.

  Turning on the faucets, she splashed cold water onto her face, grateful for the cooling relief. She was going to have to pull herself together, at least enough to get through the next couple of hours. Then she could change into sweats, curl up with a bowl of ice cream and wallow in misery for a few hours before dusting herself off and coming up with a plan. Despite the small kernel of hope, she knew that he wasn’t going to show up later.

  She laughed wryly; how much worse would it have been if she was in his arms when he regained his sight? Then she would have been forced to see the horror on his face when he realized his huge mistake. No, this way was much better; she never had to see him look at her with revulsion.

  Whoa, slow down, Vi; she told herself. He might give a plain girl a chance; after all, there was that zing, and the camaraderie between them wasn’t something that could be easily faked. There was more to her than a lack of Taylor’s sophistication and magnificence; and despite the short amount of time she and James knew each other, there was just something there. She didn’t fall in love with his attractive face; she fell in love with him.

  Ping-ponging between despair and tentative hope, she realized that it was perhaps harder to hope than to graciously accept defeat. If he rejected her face to face it was going to hurt far, far worse. She needed to concentrate on her store, maybe add a broken-hearted section that she could stock with chocolate, nature’s anti-depressant, and voodoo dolls.

  She walked out of the bathroom as Taylor walked through the front door. Surprised, or perhaps not so much, she stared at her best friend, “Taylor; what are you doing here? I thought you went to help in the store.”

  “Please,” Taylor offered a tentative smile as she closed the door behind her and crossed the small distance. Taking Victoria in her arms, she hugged her tightly. “As if I would ignore my best friend after her heart was bruised. I called in a few favors so the store is covered.”

  “Thanks,” Victoria said softly, relaxing into Taylor’s embrace. If Taylor kept this up, Victoria would be crying again. Stepping back, she took a pre-emptive swipe at the tears that threatened.

  “I hate it when you cry,” Taylor murmured, brushing her thumbs over Victoria’s cheekbones. “It kills me when you’re hurting; I would prevent it if I could.”

  “Everybody gets hurt, Taylor,” Victoria said softly, lowering her lashes unable to bear Taylor’s pity. “I’ll survive.”

  “Ah, Vi, you went and did something foolish,” Taylor murmured, pulling her friend back into a hug. Against Victoria’s hair, she said, “You went and fell in love with the guy.”

  “Maybe,” Victoria meekly answered. At Taylor’s snort, she smiled, “Probably.”

  “Oh, my poor baby,” Taylor cooed, kissing the top of Victoria’s head.

  “He thought I was you.” Victoria’s voice was muffled as she spoke. “You were right when you told me he only dates stick thin models.”

  Taylor grabbed Victoria’s shoulders and stepped back, glaring down at her miserable friend. Grabbing a hank of Victoria’s hair, she gave a not-so-gentle tug, “Don’t you dare do anything drastic to change your appearance for him; if you do, I’ll shave you bald.”

  “It never even crossed my mind,” Victoria laughed even as she sobbed. She adored Taylor and her over-the-top threats always made her life seem less dramatic. Wiping her fingers beneath her eyes, she laughed again, “Here I’m crying when I have a store to run.”

  “Vi, I told you; it’s covered,” Taylor assured her. “Take as long as you need.”

  “I think I need to work through this and tonight I can figure out what to do,” Victoria said, straightening her shoulders. Looking up at Taylor, her eyes huge and sad, “Do you think he will still want me even though I don’t look like you?”

  “Oh, Vi,” Taylor sighed, draping an arm around Victoria’s shoulders as they headed back down to the shop. “He’d be a fool to give you up and for all the things I’ve thought about James Templeton, I never thought him a fool.”

  Victoria’s lips curved up in a slight smile, “You’ve thought about James?”

  “Of course; unf
ortunately, our paths had never crossed, which is a little weird.” Taylor huffed out a slight laugh, “Whenever there was an article written about him, Mother would thrust it in my face and ask me why I can’t meet a nice, handsome, rich man like that. She always enunciated the rich part, as if I didn’t know how well off he is.”

  “I didn’t know,” Victoria admitted artlessly.

  “Vi,” Taylor heaved a sigh. “You often accuse me of living in Taylor-land but you’re just as guilty as living in Victoria-land where you believe in fairy tales and happy endings and true love. I love you to death but you believe in a myth.”

  “What’s wrong with wanting to fall in love?” Victoria asked, saddened by Taylor’s cynicism; she was far too young to be so jaded.

  “The real world isn’t a fairy tale,” Taylor said, her gaze hard as she stared off into nothing. “There are no happy endings and the only time true love exists is in the moment before you wake up.”

  “Taylor.” Victoria’s voice was barely more than a whisper.

  Turning her head, Taylor looked at her best friend, her lips curving into a sardonic smile, her exotic brown eyes bleak. “I want you to have your happy ending, Vi; just tell me what I have to do and I’ll do it.”

  Victoria looked at her best friend, wondering what put those shadows in her beautiful brown eyes. She had thought she knew everything about Taylor there was to know; apparently not. “Taylor, what is it?”

  “We have to figure out your problems first,” she murmured, forcing her smile to be brighter, her eyes to be less bleak. “Just tell me what you want me to do; please, Victoria.”

  After a moment’s consideration, Victoria told her the plan that had been formulating in her head while she wasn’t even aware of it. “On Wednesday, Marnie opens the store for me. I’m thinking I will go down to James’s office if he hasn’t called me. I was hoping you could help… give me some polish. I… want to look my best when I talk to him.”

  “When you confront him,” Taylor said with a wicked grin. “I have the perfect outfit, Vi; he’s not going to know what hit him.”

  “Exactly,” Victoria said with a pleased smile, satisfied with her plan of attack. Licking her suddenly dry lips, she looked at Taylor, beautiful, sophisticated Taylor. “Do you think I’m a fool?”

  “Yes,” her best friend said matter-of-factly. Laughing at Victoria’s outraged expression, she said, “That’s why I have always loved visiting Victoria-land; you make me want to believe in true love and happily ever after; you make me want to be foolish.”

  Stepping through the door, Victoria held out her arm to encompass her small apartment, “Welcome to my world.”

  The two girls laughed, though it was hard to miss the undertone of sadness that lingered just beneath the surface. Victoria grabbed Taylor’s hand, realizing they stood just beneath a painting of a girl pining away for her lost lover. “Taylor, don’t accept Chandler’s proposal. Don’t settle.”

  “Why ever not?” she asked, truly baffled.

  “Wait until you find the person that makes your heart race,” Victoria said fervently. “Even when it hurts, there’s nothing like the euphoria that comes with that zing.”

  “Well, if you get your happy ending, I’ll consider it.” She didn’t sound convinced that Victoria was going to get a happy ending. But Taylor knew something Victoria didn’t, something that Victoria deserved to know; she just wasn’t going to add any weight to her friend’s shoulders, not today.

  Chapter 13

  I need time to figure things out; I’m sorry, James had simply written in a brief text message Sunday afternoon.

  He didn’t show up Sunday night like he planned but Victoria had expected as much. But then Monday and Tuesday also passed without a word from James; and by Wednesday, Victoria was pretty much convinced that he didn’t want anything to do with her since he kissed Taylor right in front of her. He was a proud man and probably didn’t deal well with mistakes or embarrassment, which could explain his silence. Each night that she went to bed without hearing from him, she fell a little further into hopelessness. In contrast, a strange calmness stole over her, bringing with it an absurd hope that if he happened to see her, he would instantly recognize her and fall in love all over.

  It was that irrational logic that dragged her out of bed early Wednesday morning and calling Taylor. With Taylor’s expert help, she spent the extra time getting ready so she could look her absolute best when she arranged a chance encounter with James to prove her theory.

  Pulling her hair back into an elegant, French twist, she then tugged a few tendrils free to curl artfully around her face. She let Taylor apply her makeup, what little she wore, so she wouldn’t look as if she had spent the last three days in a funk, unable to sleep and smiling through the pain.

  Taylor chose a gorgeous, elegant outfit: a silky, strappy cream colored dress that fit Victoria perfectly. The bodice hugged her curves, emphasizing her femininity, while the skirt flared loosely at her hips. Four and a half inch sandals complimented the look. Studying her reflection in the mirror, she figured she could pass for high society, at least for a few minutes. Of course, if he loved her it wouldn’t matter one way or the other; she just wanted to look her best.

  As she left her apartment, Taylor gave her an extra-long hug and wished her luck, “I want you to have your fairy tale, Vi; I want it more than you could possibly imagine.”

  The drive to his office building seemed to take forever, but that was because her heart was pounding so fast time seemed to slow down. Considering it was just after rush hour, she actually made pretty good time. Checking her make up one last time in the rear-view mirror, she was satisfied with the result. It was more make up than she was used to but it covered the dark circles beneath her eyes. James was going to see her for the first time and she looked the best she had ever looked.

  For a moment, she considered changing her mind; how foolish was it to expect him to recognize her when he had never seen her before? Opening her door and climbing out of the car, she answered her own question – pretty, darn foolish. But she had to try, otherwise she would always be left wondering – would he recognize his soul mate if she stood right in front of him?

  Would it make a difference if he didn’t?

  She didn’t want to think that far ahead; in fact, she had most of her hopes riding on the idea that he would know her, sight unseen, simply because they had that zing. Even knowing it was far-fetched, she hoped. Striding across the foyer of the grand building, she found a seat in the small bistro where James mentioned always ordering breakfast. The spot was perfect – she could see the entrance and everyone who went through.

  As a waitress walked by her table, Victoria snagged her attention, “Excuse me, miss; do you know if Mr. Templeton been through here yet?”

  “No, ma’am, his order is still at the counter,” the girl answered. When Victoria didn’t say anything else, the waitress asked, “Did you want to order something while you wait?”

  “Yes, thank you,” Victoria smiled, keeping one eye on the entrance. “A glass of orange juice and a cinnamon roll, please.”

  “Sure thing,” the girl nodded, walking away and leaving Victoria to wait.

  Nervously tapping her foot, Victoria watched the front door, oblivious to everyone not James. Within minutes, her cinnamon roll and juice were placed in front of her but there was still no James. How many people worked there, for goodness sake? What if she missed him because there were simply too many people coming and going and….

  But then he walked through the doors and everything stilled; he walked with such confidence and determination. Wearing a charcoal gray suit and a dark tie, his black hair neatly trimmed, he personified success. He definitely didn’t look as if he had spent the last few days freaking out over the hiccup in their relationship. Unable to get enough of him, she watched him with hungry eyes. Even as he strode past her table without sparing her a cursory glance, she couldn’t stop her body’s reaction. Clutching the glas
s of orange juice between shaking hands, she watched as he stood at the counter and picked up his breakfast already waiting for him.

  Her heart was pounding so loud, she thought he would be able to hear it. As he stood there chatting with the cashier, he started to turn his head, a peculiar expression on his handsome face. Victoria stopped breathing as she willed him to look at her, to recognize her. But then his eyes slid right past her without pausing and a knife was thrust through her chest, making it difficult to take a breath.

  With his coffee in hand, he turned around and started to walk towards her. Victoria’s heart leapt in her chest; he was walking straight towards her. He must have rec…og…. Nope, he didn’t even slow down as he passed her table; he was too busy drinking his coffee to even realize she was sitting there. Obviously, he just wasn’t attracted to her, at least not enough to warrant even a passing glance.

  True Love was obviously not blind.

  She had come that far; she was going to see it through. After finding a bathroom to make sure she didn’t look like a ghost, she was going to march up to his office and waltz through that door and demand he look at her, demand he see her. And if he didn’t like what he saw than screw him, she would just have to learn to live with half a heart.

  Before she found a bathroom, she just wanted to drink in the sight of him looking absolutely amazing in his business suit while he waited for the elevator. She missed his smile.

  “Victoria!” Catherine’s voice called out from across the lobby, demanding her attention. Victoria turned her head and saw James’s assistant hurrying towards her from the entrance, a large manila folder in her hands.

  In the moment that Victoria had looked away, the elevator doors must have closed and she had missed seeing James. Distraught, her head whipped back and violet eyes crashed into green eyes from twenty feet away. Only, James didn’t look happy to see her, even from this distance. His jaw was clenched and his free hand was curled into a fist. Victoria watched helplessly as he turned on his heels and walked away, probably to find the stairwell in his rush to get away from her.